Friday, September 14, 2012


This story has a disturbing scene or two, so please prepare yourself. This is the first short story I have written with a typewriter, and figured I would share it.


  1. o_O;


    Holy cow!

    Did I mention I love suspense/horror? This was THE best short story I've read in a long time!

    ...I need to get writing myself...

  2. That was.....definitely wasn't expecting that

  3. Thanks to everyone for reading and the kind words. Crit is always welcome, of course. Tell me what I did wrong, what you would like to see.
    Thanks so much. More to come? Perhaps...

  4. The bare bones of this story hang together very well, with a good build-up of suspense.

    Very descriptive phrases, especially when you don't use too many words.

    "The air in the room was stale, stagnant, disinfected" is a great example of good writing, to me. Economy of words.

    The overall pace of the story is excellent.

    Rupert is the name of my cat!